Rutgers Spying Defendant gets 30 days in jail.

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Honestly, I am VERY surprised by this verdict.

When I first learned of the story I became sad & livid. I mean we can’t bring the victim back and this could have been prevented. His family and friends are without their loved one.

Anytime someone commits suicide it’s hard for me to fathom, so when I learned what triggered Tyler Clementi to commit suicide I became extremely sympathetic. Invested. Followed the story.

What Tyler’s roommate Dharun Ravi and friend did to him was pure WrongEvil. In my opinion. I think he knows that now .

Putting a webcam in his room without his permission, exploiting his private life without his permission online, making fun of him, calling him names, bullying and so much more is just wrong and goes against morality.

I mean where do we as humans get off thinking we are more superior than the next human being? Who in the hell told us this? When I hear of kids and adults who exemplify this behavior I have an extremely hard time sympathetizing with them…

So when i learned this young guy who was primarily responsible for Tyler’s death gets 30 days in jail I started to have mixed feelings about the verdict.

I need a hear your thoughts? What do you think should have been done? You can’t bring Tyler back, but was there are lesson that could have been taught? A lesson that could scare other humans who like to bully, tease, invade someone’s privacy, and go as far as commiting hate crimes into thinking twice about their actions?

What’s the solution.

Peace and love,

J

link to story.

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14 Comments

  1. rebeKah

    Jane, when I heard about that young man’s suicide, I bawled my eyes out. How much anguish he must have been in to climb a bridge, jump and end his life. And, I cried for those stupid college students who were bucking jerks to do that to another human being.
    Stupid college students. Stupid college students who think that they know it all (because at that age, you think you do), and you think that you are superior and better than someone else.
    NOT for ANY reason to justify what they did– but I am certain that they understand the seriousness of what they’ve done now and it has aged and stained their lives forever. Unfortunately, its too late for ALL of them. It’s tragic.

  2. I think he should’ve gotten atleast 180 days in jail..I came up with 180 days because thats how much time you get for getting caught with under 2 oz of Drug Possession(Basically committing a crime by yourself..minding ur own business) So someone can get caught with some weed and get 180 days in jail…But this guy can infringe on someone’s Basic Universal Human Right to privacy driving them to suicide and get just 30 days.(I’m not endorsing Drug possession btw, but I think you get my point lol) Although this court case will follow him for the rest of his life, I still feel like a month in jail w/ 300 hours of community service, and Anti-Cyberbullying classes is just a real big “Slap on the Wrist”. However, with the controversy that situation caused, I’m sure more people will think Twice about trying to belittle someone by violating their space and privacy.

    • I also feel that the reason people do horrible things like this or worse is because a lot of us as humans feel this extreme separation from one another. Before he did that to Tyler, he should have asked himself,”How would I feel if someone were to sneak a webcam in my room while I was doing something very private with myself or someone else?” A lot of people don’t know how to put themselves in other people shoes. smh

  3. When Tyler Clementi committed suicide it made news here in Australia as I’m sure it did all over the world, which it needed to.

    “I mean where do we as humans get off thinking we are more superior than the next human being” – my thoughts exactly. We all have different traits, sexualities, likes/dislikes that make us uniquely ‘us’, but strip away those elements and we’re all just people. I’m not sure why such a simple idea is so easily forgotten. I find it disgraceful that today people still think one’s sexuality, a part of them they can’t control, is a reason to single them out. As a gay woman this saddens me. Actually no, as a human being this saddens me.

    So then I suppose the question I’m left asking myself is does this 30 day jail sentence really convey to people how serious it is to invade someone’s privacy/bully them? To me, it doesn’t.

    I really don’t know whether this case will be a deterrent for others if it isn’t taken more seriously. I sincerely hope that coverage of this story, and even the discussions that have stemmed from the sentencing itself, makes a difference to public opinion.

  4. Avi

    I can’t really judge on what Mr. Ravi’s sentence should be. It’s hard to say.. Is he being judged for spying, invasion of privacy and bullying, or because his roommate killed himself, and people want to blame it on someone else? I’m sure it should be the first one, AND someone has to do something to stop this, even if that other person doesn’t commit suicide. What about those paparazzis who take pictures of artists in their privacy, or those who gossip about them.. shouldn’t they also go to jail?
    If it’s because he commited suicide, then, should all those human beings who are part of why people commit suicide, go to jail (parents, partner, boss, etc)?

    True that Mr. Ravi was a crucial part of his death, but who knows if he was struggling against other issues, too (I’m just saying). Someone should’ve done something to support this kid. All I can say is he acted very immature, stupid, not being emphatic with his roomate, and stupid again. I don’t know exactly how the school/college student interaction works in the US, but from what I’ve been able to read/hear there’s alot of bullying, discrimination and humilliation to other students, wich makes me sick.

    I’m sure this event will haunt Mr. Ravi for the rest of his life, and that he has learnt a lesson. Social pressure is something really hard to handle (E.g. death of Kevin Carter, photographer africanhistory.about.com/b/2006/04/12/the-journalist-the-vulture-and-the-child.htm).

    In agreement with KEKE/LELE’s post, if we were able to be empathic to others, and listen to them just a little bit more, the world would be a better place.

  5. rebeKah

    Actually, I am quite curious to know how universities handle bullying, invasion of privacy, etc. . BUT, to set up a webcam to spy on someone is HEINOUSLY evil. Was the 30 day jail time because of that? Regardless, the sentence was extremely lenient and I hope others learn from this.

  6. MorningSunInMoscow

    30 days is something to be scoffed at. And the comment by one of Ravi’s supporters that Ravi spent 2 years in “purgatory” is laughable, at best. Purgatory? Really? He was out on bail. He was completely free to go about his life as he chose within the confines of New Jersey. Purgatory my ass.

    Ravi’s actions were despicable which show an apathetic nature about him. He didn’t even think about the consequences of his actions. And if he did, he simply didn’t care. If the roles were reversed on him, his family or any of his supporters, they would be OUTRAGED at the lack of punishment for the public humiliation (which, in my opinion, is far worse than the invasion of privacy) they had to endure. And the fact that this poor young man was driven to kill himself over the humiliation and yet he STILL only got 30 days…that’s just a slap in the face to his family and his entire existence.

    How can this NOT be classified as a hate crime? The tweet Ravi posted was very clear that he was posting the video because Tyler was kissing another man. That reaction wouldn’t have been elicited if he were caught on camera kissing a woman. And all of the people who watched and did nothing to stand up for the poor victim…they are just as disgusting as Ravi. Disgusting.

    Now, I must say, there must have been some underlying emotional issues (depression, bi polar, etc) that led Tyler to commit suicide. That isn’t an end that most emotionally stable people find to a means regardless of the situation. But regardless of that fact, Ravi’s actions were the straw that broke the camel’s back. And with this 30 sentence, it’s just showing the world how little we as a nation value privacy, respect, and most of all, preservation of dignity.

  7. this issue angers me on a couple of levels, first and foremost!the malice shown by this moron is far more than just a momentary lapse in judgement,it at best reprehensible! but beyond that it goes to show a frightening trend of intolerance and lack of morality!!that is sweeping through humanity and threatens the creators plan of the prime collective!we cannot depend on the legal system to fix such actions,its like putting on a seat belt after an accident ! its to little to late!!we must stop living in our little facebook and twitter world and realize our actions effect the people around us! the creator has already given us ten rules to live by theirs no room for negotiation here!if those values were taught and enforced, maybe this fool wouldn’t have done such an insensitive and cruel thing to another human!but when our moral conscious is a computer and facebook what do we expect.we surf the internet like generals in a war room detached from the violence of war !until it touches us and then we hide behind self righteousness as a shield!i am not a gay man but i am a human!and what was done to that kid was shameful!but its only a glimps of what we as a society could become!we have to do better !or be crushed by the weight of our own ignorance!!in the end we are all atlas with a world of choices and conciseness to bear on our shoulders!!!

  8. Mykal Monroe

    I am conflicted. Jane’s post was my first exposure to this incident and I clicked on the NYTimes link to read up on the story so my thoughts are a result of my very limited knowledge of the case. Something is telling me that Ravi himself may be struggling/coming to terms with his own sexuality. If he knew beforehand that his roommate requested the room to spend time with his male friend/partner other than looking for a way to exploit that and humiliate him by showin others, I think he wanted to actually SEE for himself what it looks/feels like for two men to be sexually active with one another. This case is extremely complicated and layered. I agree with Avi that there are most likely others too that can be held responsible for this poor young man’s suicide, but as it was pointed out earlier jumping to the extreme of taking one’s own life could be a result of some sort of mental instability.

    This guy will in fact be forever be a prisoner to his own thoughts and recollections to what he did and his part (perhaps) in this young boy’s death. 30 days in jail is slight and he should have received more whether or not he was directly or indirectly responsible for the boy’s death because he invaded his privacy and made discriminating public tweets about his sexuality. That alone deserves greater consequences. People need to understand that while we are all entitled to our own beliefs and opinions, the moment it takes another’s rights away either directly or indirectly, it wrong. And something should be done.

    May Tyler rest in peace.

  9. Jovian Zayne

    The bullying has to stop. Period. It manifest itself everywhere. On the web, in person and on TV! It’s on basketball wives, bad girls club, MTV programming, BET, even ABC family. The idea that one person can bully another person into something else is way too common now a days. I know this is not a new phenomenon but with our online properties now, bullying has become more rampant and it’s effect felt perhaps more severely. They’re defiantly felt more widespread.

  10. People do stupid things for no apparent reason and don’t think about the consequences that come with those choices. I’m not that excuses what he did but if Ravi knew that Tyler kill himself after that incident then he probably wouldn’t have done it unless he is a complete asshole. This has happened too many times in the past and probably will still continue in the future. Hopefully one day this ignorance will stop.

  11. I’m now seeing all of this God knows how much longer after the fact. But I really don’t know how else to say that “I’m tired, just tired of the excuse we call human nature.” What Ravi did was disgusting – it is disgusting. In today’s world we seem to think that it’s our right to find targets who we could humiliate and attack. The irony is that while we’re doing it, we know that it’s wrong. While we’re doing it, we k now that we’re hurting the person. Bu we don’t care simply because their pain is our pawn to popularity . Without our selected ‘underdogs’ we wouldn’t be ‘somebody’. We think its our righ to set scalesto judge other people, point fingers away from our faces and straight into the face of oher people who are living their lives and doing far less damaging things that what we’re embarrassing for with the hope that while we point at them, we’re distracting everyone from knowing who and what we really are.

    Bullying doesn’t start off as an extreme act. Like many other things, it starts off as a seed. The more we water that seed, the bigger it grows and before you know it you have a big ass sycamore tree growing in the middle of your house which you now have to classify as fine art furniture. That’s what Ravi’s act is – a sycamore tree. He would have been highlighting what he considered to be underdogs and exposing them as humiliated freaks. This doesn’t mean that Ravi has never been hurt. Nor does it mean that he isn’t hurt. It simply means that his pain didn’t teach him how to be empathetic. It didn’t teach him to live and let live. It didn’t teach him to be his brother’s keeper and worse of all it didn’t teach him how to see pain in others even if they showed you a mask smile.

    The truth is that many times when people commit suicide they don’t do it because of 1 problem. Its done because they’ve had enough, want to get away from that hollow, empty, pain and they’re tired of trying to simply be in a world of people who think its their right to tell you how to be while chastising you for being you. Ravi was too full of Ravi and the expected ‘glory’ that was to come out of humiliating Tyler, to see that Tyler was already hurting – damaged goods and a soul screaming to shed his light on a dark personality that opened his wounds and made his pain exceptionally unbearable.

    All I ask is for us to ask more questions, understand people more and we’ll judge less and live and let live – less people would be hurt if we do. We all have to look at yourself and be honest and wonder, even on a small scale basis, who are the Tylers in my life? Am I someone’s Ravi?

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